Sale PSA: The classic woven slide sandal from Bottega, now $607, a pretty white poplin dress from J.Crew, now $70 with code SHOPNOW, and fun pajama sets from Sleeper, now 60% off (if I am ever cast on Real Housewives I will buy these so I can have nice pajamas for the cameras).
Hi there! I know there has been a gap since I last posted. I feel guilty whenever I realize there’s been a gap, and then I feel like well, should I just stop blogging, but something always makes me stop and just say well no, I will miss it, and I always do. Because I find fun articles I’d like to share, nice pieces, etc, great books. But I know I haven’t been a consistent writer here. So if you’re still reading, I really appreciate it – thank you!
To be honest I’ve been confused lately as to what it is I want to read on the internet. I barely read any of the blogs, especially the fashion oriented ones I used to follow. The same goes for a lot of the content on IG – it’s not that I’m upset with anything, it’s just that I keep scrolling and scrolling past. The photos are gorgeous and so are the clothes and etc. But I don’t really care. I can’t tell if it’s because I’ve kind of aged out of things in terms of both pure age as well as lifestyle (aka mom of young kids) or if I’ve just fallen “out” of things in general. Like, tumbled off whatever normal train we’re supposed to be on into some weird place.
Clothes, too. I love clothes! And I still love shopping, especially when stressed, which I know isn’t the greatest, but we all have our coping mechanisms, yes? But there’s only so many clothes I need or want. And even sale shopping isn’t as fun now, now that everything is going to final sale (though I know there were return abusers stores were trying to manage, and that retail in general is tough) and etc etc etc. I tried to go shopping in person the other day, and it was really strange as well to see all the “regular” stores like Gap, J.Crew, empty, and then lines in front of all the luxury boutiques so you couldn’t just pop in. It was a little deflating. But again, maybe I’m just that old man yelling on my lawn about the old days.
It was like this in Europe, too, by the way – I went to London/Paris with the family and there were lines at all the luxury shops. I mean, have you ever tried to tell a kid they are going to have to wait ~1 hour because mommy has to see if there’s a fun green duffel at Goyard? So I didn’t really shop at any of the usuals. It was one of the first trips I’ve ever done when I had zero VAT forms to file on the way home. At the airport, I kept getting a weird feeling like I forgot something. But I didn’t! I didn’t buy anything, save for some sunscreen.
Anyway. This is really a stream of consciousness post (aka the worst kind). But just me popping in to say hi, and that I’m still around, I’m still going to be posting, it’s just sometimes I want to take a step back and take a breather. And also that I would LOVE to hear about what you are all reading and enjoying on the internet and beyond – if you’re going through a sort of loss of interest like I am, or not. Or if you’re still following all the same influencers on IG, etc. Or if you’ve moved to Substack! I keep having the same issue with Substack – find a person I like, read a few posts, then forget about them altogether.
It’s easy to forget and drop things on the internet. I know. So if you’re reading this, thanks for reading here. Truly, truly. And I’d love to hear how you are doing.
29 Comments
Susan
July 28, 2023 at 8:55 amHi Kathy. Please keep writing, I love your blog. And I
love to shop, and tried to get to London a week ago but instead spent 24 excruciating hours at the airport before I went back home. To try and distract myself from the heat, and the dumpster fire which is our politics now, I read. A lot, especially mysteries…I just finished “The Searcher” by Tanya French, and I hated to see it end, which rarely happens! I’m also reading “Hello Beautiful” by Ann Napolitano, great so far, “Almost Everything” by Anne Lamott (inspirational and a riot, as are all her books) and “Born To Be Postumous” by Mark Dery about Edward Gorey. Gorey is an acquired taste, and I acquired it early. Finally, I just saw a sign painted in huge letters on the back of a construction dumpster…”Always be kinder than you feel” Good to take on board.
Sara
July 28, 2023 at 9:24 amIf it means anything, I always check FeatherFactor on Fridays. I’ve been reading your blog since my college days (which was over 10 years ago now) and still enjoy it today. I think it’s because I’ve always loved the mix of luxury, articles, fashion, and relatable life. For me, FF is the rare corner of the internet that I can feel good about spending my time in. So thanks for continuing to post! I personally don’t mind the gaps 😉
I don’t know if you’re into non-fiction but I am a big Cal Newport fan and your current situation with the internet/social media reminds me a little bit of “Digital Minimalism”. I re-read it recently and deleted FB and IG off my phone a few weeks back. I might go back one day but for now, I don’t miss them.
Hope you have a lovely Friday!
Sharon M
July 28, 2023 at 9:52 amPlease keep up Feather Factor! Take time off, of course, but don’t stop! One of my favorite reads! I subscribe to a number of Substack blogs…some paid, most not…when they appear in my inbox I normally skip by them, maybe to come back later. As far as books…trying to make my way through Romantic Comedy…not that I don’t like it, but I put it down and forget to go back to it. Ebb and flow…
Sharon M
July 29, 2023 at 11:52 amJust this minute finished Romantic Comedy…came back to say that and that I enjoyed it a lot…a rom com with a happy ending…what’s not to like?
Lissa Summers
July 28, 2023 at 10:32 amHi Kathy – I started reading my favorite blogs 15 years ago because they were real people into fashion-interior design-architecture, who came across as authentic, normal, and honest. Now they are all basically ads for the same products set in different age groups. I know these things are monetized, but the pop-ups have become overwhelmingly annoying.
I got into Fintwit when $GME thing was happening (a way to bond with my gamer-son) and stayed ever since. My daughter’s high school friends are now grown-up investment bankers, and I enjoy talking to them about various macro happenings (and food). I’ve pretty much stayed with Fintwit (now FinX?) where I learn thru reading various thesis, and then I go down research bunnie trails. I’m entertained (lots of laughing), and encouraged by the fact that even the “pro’s” who’ve been doing finance for a gazillion years, often get it wrong – some are humbled and some will never admit they’re wrong (highly entertaining). I follow investors, swing-traders, economists in Germany/Italy/London, and even parody accounts like Not Jerome Powell, @CramerTracker (Inverse Cramer), @greg16676935420 (greg). I like @SahilBloom and get his newsletter for positive/pragmatic approaches to life, @RudyHavenstein (out there but thought-provoking), @BillyM2k (Shibetoshi Nakamoto), @PauloMacro, @INArteCarloDoss (KKGB Kitty) and @MiamKitty (Kitty Miam Miam – the foodie account for KKGB Kitty)… I follow a variety of finance people in various age groups with different life experiences and VERY different political views. I’ve learned a lot from @unusualwhales, @hmeisler (Helene is the OG chartist who has seen it all), @IvanTheK (another OG in finance)…
I’m being cautious with spending (was married 23 years then divorced). I haven’t been buying much in the way of clothes/bags anymore either. There isn’t much out there that makes my heart skip a beat. I’ve been slowly getting rid of stuff, and I’ve only been traveling locally, going to live music events with friends.
Currently working thru Oppenheimer, but I might give up and go see the movie anyway. Loved your books, BTW! I hope you have another one in you and the time to get it out there. The last one was SOOOO good, I can’t believe it hasn’t been optioned (or has it?)!
The negativity in the world gets too much sometimes, but I try to focus on the people in my day-to-day life, showing grace and kindness to strangers as well as people I know but don’t necessarily enjoy. Thanks for checking in with your blog and keeping it real!
cc
July 28, 2023 at 11:03 amLongtime fan here! I habitually check twice a week to see if you’ve posted. 🙂
Lately I’ve been focusing my reading on Japanese authors. Can’t really recall actual titles and authors, as I float through them continuously. But right now, I’m reading the The Ten Loves of Nishino by Hiromi Kawakami. I love Japanese fiction because there’s always something a little quirky and unexpected.
Shopping has also fallen off my list of fun things to do. I attended a wedding recently and simply online ordered my dress, and wore it without giving it a second thought.. That’s how unmotivated I have been to get out there. I’ve wondered if this low desire and apathy was due to a mild form of unhappiness and despondence ….but I’ve come to the conclusion that I am no longer in the acquisition stage of my life. I’m too focused trying to make the most of the second half of my life, even if all it entails is simply reading a book.Happy to have read your post today. Thank you for continuing your blog!
Paradise
July 28, 2023 at 1:53 pmLongtime fan here too! Found you from online search about taking care of cashmere sweaters. I also check twice a week for any new posts. Totally understand the feeling… everything seems so same same out there, the traffic, the air travel, the crowds and lines, the heat… so delighted you’re still blogging when you feel up to it. Would love to know which blogs you read for some inspiration.
simiyalala
July 28, 2023 at 3:10 pmI really enjoyed the Karl Lagerfeld biography Paradise Now. I didn’t know how talented he was, and catty!
TiredMomofTwo
July 28, 2023 at 5:21 pmI’m really enjoying reading I’ll Show Myself Out by Jessi Klein. I’m also reading Robert Wittman’s book Priceless, which is an account of his time as an FBI agent who recovers stolen art. I’m mourning the close of this lovely store called Tail of the Yak in Berkeley. You might be familiar with it – they’ve been around for 50 years. I do enjoy reading your blog and check it every so often. It’s been lovely to read your musings all these years.
mtl
July 28, 2023 at 7:05 pmKathy please don’t ever stop blogging!!! I LOVE your blog so much. Please know it brings your community such joy. I only read a handful of blogs that I love from back in the day. 9to5chic is my fave next to yours. I also love mademoiselle out of Australia and Atlantic Pacific just because it’s fun to look at her unabashed take on maximalism. I also love food blogs and so read the smitten kitchen and subscribe to Dinner a Love Story substack and also Luisa Weiss of “The Wednesday Chef”. I also really love reading through recipes on King Arthur Flour because i love to bake :).
Overall, I think it’s normal to go through very uninspiring fashion moments. There are probably other things right now that bring you more joy! Kids, reading something else, puzzles…any of those!
What is it with those lines outside the luxury stores in Europe?! That is just sadness.
Linda
July 28, 2023 at 10:00 pmHi Kathy! Hope you and your family are well. Your blog is one of the very few I still read today — I always check to see if you have a new post every week.
Also a mom of young kids here… stumbled on your page a long time ago bc of an Hermes bag search on the internet. (Do you still carry yours? I tend to reach for the ones that aren’t even Hermes these days.)
I, too, am getting very uninterested in a lot of things shared on social media these days… almost everything seems staged for likes… like why? Especially the oversharing of luxury items…
Shopping doesn’t seem as fun as it used to for me as well. Maybe bc we have the basics, and don’t need anything else. Better for our wallets and environment. If I need sth that I don’t have, I just try my best to shop online and hope it works out… otherwise, my kids will end up coming home w more books, small toys, and stuffies they don’t need anymore of, lol.
Please do take a break and enjoy life! But do know that you have many loyal readers like us who really appreciate your posts — especially this one. Hugs.
bunny
July 29, 2023 at 3:51 amK- thank you for the updates, even intermittent are better than none (but yes I like everyone else still check twice a week!!!)
I’ve read you since purse forum, and I relate to everything you’ve said! Keep the stream of consciousness coming, it’s very sleepless nights and im into it. Also we do need another book!!! please!!
VS
July 29, 2023 at 6:58 amK – thanks for the update! I enjoy reading you at whatever frequency you post that works for you. I stumbled on Feather Factor years ago when I was researching a bag – I think the Goyard Belvedere. Yours was the only “fashion blog” I ever read, and I enjoyed your posts for your writing style and authenticity and reading recommendations. Recently, I was searching for Tokyo advice and an old post of yours showed up in google, when you were pregnant with Baby Feather 1! And this reminded me how long I’ve been reading you and that I also loved your travel posts.
I’ve enjoyed both your books and look forward to the next one. What I’m saying is I’m a fan for life 🙂 Take care and sending you good vibes always.
I’ve been reading a lot of non fiction on the futility of trying to be productive. Currently reading 4000 weeks by Oliver Burkeman and just finished TimeSmart by Ashley Whillans. Recommend both! And have been doing mystery jigsaw puzzles.
A
July 29, 2023 at 10:18 amI will be pleased to read whatever you post, in whatever timeframe works for you; yours is one of the very few social media activities in which I participate. I enjoy your mix of interests and very much appreciate your recommendations. Your blog is among the three or four that I follow on social media; I’ve been wary about the whole social media enterprise for quite some time and am happy with my decision to limit my participation. (And that was before I saw Netflix’s the Social Dilemna!)
I’m rather late to this book, but I’ve just finished Circe by Madeline Miller and concur that the accolades were well-deserved. I found it a profoundly moving piece of work. It’s stayed with me as I’ve been out in the garden and in the kitchen…..
Ji
July 30, 2023 at 12:49 amI think how you’re feeling is pretty common for women in their 40s with little kids. You’re not really young, you’re not that old. It’s hard to figure out which trends are actually relevant
TG
July 30, 2023 at 12:21 pmLike many others here, I faithfully check the blog every weekend as yours is one of the very few that is real, authentic, not influenced, not using “suggestions” from PR firms. The combo of life, books, luxury and family is the same stage of life I am in and its nice to know there are so many others out there who are of the same view. Hope you keep writing here and also professionally – your books have been great!
Helena Yu
July 31, 2023 at 12:14 pmHi! Just also stopping by to say that I love your blog and faithfully check it every week as well. Your diverse interests – from fashion to reading fit mine and I always appreciate the fashion items and suggested reads. Post as often or as little as you’d like, but don’t stop!
Olivia
July 31, 2023 at 3:52 pmHi! Another longtime reader here! I really enjoy reading your blog and appreciate all your recommendations on interesting things to read and purchase. Thanks so much for all you do!
Anna
July 31, 2023 at 8:29 pmHi Kathy,
Yup, certainly still a reader 10+ years later. Yours is the only blog I care for these days. I always check in on your book recommendations, and while my day job doesn’t leave me much time for pleasure reading, I’ve bought and read your suggestions. I hope you continue blogging!
Tian
July 31, 2023 at 9:48 pmPlease keep on writing! I love your book recommendations especially
Sharyn
August 1, 2023 at 3:12 pmDear Kat,
I so appreciate your blog and check every Friday if you’ve posted. Thank you so much for sticking with this for so many years – I’ve read it from the beginning. It’s the only blog I follow nowadays because your writing is terrific, your article recommendations are spot on, and you are so kind and relatable. I am also tired of the 1) IG influencers that all try to push the same thing (and most of it isn’t great anyway or is a terrible fit for my figure) and 2) the other influencers whose feeds seem like an endless loop of showing off designer items layered with other designer items. It’s a bit much to take in and seems like a personal safety risk to go out like that these days!
Shopping has been such a disappointment, I agree. I don’t need any more clothes and while looking online is fun, the pieces in real life rarely live up to my expectations. The sizing is really odd too (so boxy – looking at you, J Crew, COS, and Banana) and the prices aren’t that compelling especially when it does not really fill a void in my closet. It’s a shame so many things are final sale, but it just deters me from buying more which is excellent :). My old mainstay Zara, where I could reliably find a treasure every so often, has devolved into complete junk (with apologies to Zara fans). The fabric is, for the most part, terrible and the quality isn’t great. There is no Zara near me anymore and I do not feel comfortable ordering from them online because I am really unsure what I will receive. It’s kind of a relief to cross another retailer off my list.
Kristin V
August 2, 2023 at 11:04 amHi, Kathy, echoing the sentiment of all the above. Your blog will always be a favorite, no matter the frequency with which you post. We want it to be fun/rewarding for you, not a to-do item! A few random thoughts
Clothes – I am in your same age range and I think the combination of kids/not having a strict work dress code/being of a certain age make dressing or really BUYING an interesting exercise. I love Classic Six, which is a female-founded capsule wardrobe, and I like to see what is trending and integrate as I deem fit – for example I’ll be folding in the vest-as-shirt trend but passing on cargos. Both bring nostaglia from my middle school years, so even though it makes me feel old, its fun to see again. I did just buy a second pair of High Sports, which many don’t understand, but they make me feel chic 🙂
Reading – This blog is top of list. I also appreciate Brooklyn Blonde, The Flair Index, Courtney Grow, and others. It’s interesting, some are practical, some are situational, some are aspirational. I feel the same way about books, a rotation of literary/beautiful writing mixed with “easy reads”/fun plot lines (rich people behaving badly a common theme).
LIfe – It’s crazy out there, so its fair to want to go inward/cocoon with your sweet family. I feel the same. I often think of this Billy Joel line “The good old days weren’t always good, and tomorrow ain’t as bad as it seems”. I’m not all rosy on the world out there, but being hopeful and thoughtful (and hopefully helpful!!) brings me peace.
Sophie G.
August 5, 2023 at 7:54 amHi Kathy,
Seeing your blog in my RSS feed is a treat every Friday (or Saturdays!). I don’t have kids but I’m in my early 40s also and I feel the same way. It’s been ages since I’ve looked at TPF, and my last Hermes scarf purchases have been vintage. I rediscovered Longchamp because true luxury bag prices have become insane and I can’t justify them, even if I earn the money for them. I think my interests have shifted towards collecting 18th and 19th century ceramics, and I keep my fun money for auctions rather than clothes. It’s also how the world has gotten more casual – no point in wearing a Chanel skirt on a Teams call! All that to say, you’re not alone in this feeling. Please keep writing – I loved your book and I always look forward to your book recommendations!
Lila
August 5, 2023 at 7:37 pmHi Kathy – I am a bit late to this post, but I wanted to chime in with everyone else and thank you for keeping this blog up and running for the past many years. I started reading your blog when I was still in undergrad (!), and a whole decade later, I’m still here! I remember being in my 20s, straight out of college, and gawking at the lifestyles and spending habits of the women featured in your “interview series”. Now that I’m more established in my career and have more spending power, I occasionally go back into your archives for lifestyle and shopping tips. I also referred to your “Should I get a MBA” post when I myself was considering applying to bschool a few years ago. I ended up doing a MBA.
It is my Friday habit to check here for your weekly Friday post. I particularly enjoy seeing your article and book recommendations, and check most of them out. Times have changed in the last decade and many bloggers have either closed their blogs, or migrated to IG and now TikTok. You’re one of the few OG bloggers who have stuck around. I hope you still stick around in the near future, and please don’t feel pressured to have to constantly churn out content. Take a break when you need to, and your readers like me will still be around when you feel re-charged and ready to come back!
All the best,
L.
Lisa Richards
August 6, 2023 at 4:58 pmHi Kathy,
Please keep writing. Yours is the only blog that I read now. And I do find that these past pandemic years has lessened my shopping and travelling urges. I guess it’s made me realize that I don’t need more stuff. I have rediscovered my love of doing jigsaw puzzles and am pleased to find many other puzzlers have taken it up again.
Anonymous
August 9, 2023 at 9:33 amHi Kathy,
Just popping in the echo everyone else’s sentiments, that I love reading your blog and please take the time you need to step back when you need it. I’ve been reading your blog for over 10 years, since I was in University, and it’s the only blog I read now that I’m “grown up”, married and with young kids.
My shopping habits have also died down over the past few years (pandemic, kids, etc.), in part because I find there’s only so much stuff I can physically and mentally house (although similar to how there’s a separate stomach for ice cream, there’s always room for jewelry).
I’ve come to the conclusion that whatever path your on, whatever interests have fallen to the wayside or made their way back into your orbit, that’s fine, that’s life, and it’s all beautiful.
Thank you for your time, dedication and sincerity all these years, and hoping to continue following you for many more.
Tanya
August 11, 2023 at 8:19 pmI love, love, love your blog and hope you continue. I’ve been reading it for years! I read on Feedly and am always so happy to see a new post. I also don’t buy as much these days (age? 2 kids?) but I read more than ever. I would miss your blog so much. But you do whatever is best for you. xoxo (because while we don’t know each other, you feel like an old friend).
v
November 10, 2023 at 11:55 pmKat, I started reading your blog in my college years, and now in my 40s. I loved your interview series that you did a long time ago. Also, to this day, I still use Cure, the exfoliant that you recommended a LONG time ago. I loved seeing your wedding pic by my fellow industry friend, Jose. I could not be happier for you when you had your little ones.
Regarding shopping, I had moments when I felt I accumulated junk and Marie Kondo’ed my entire closet and had no interest in shopping, but usually the desire will come back. I thought I learned my lessons and then I succumbed again. Now, my interest is more on maximizing our wealth after taxes and ensuring our retirement is well funded and invested. I also no longer am trying to be at 100% productivity and efficiency. LOL.
Anyways, I want to drop by and let you know that I will always occasionally drop by. It is normal for you to feel what you feel. I fell in and out of things too. We evolve in our taste and interest, among other things, especially as we grow older. Let’s embrace the good and the not-so-good that come with aging. Even k-dramas have their dry-spell moments. I am happy to read your thoughts whenever you post, and please don’t feel like you *have to* post or maintain any cadence.
Sending you and your beautiful family big hugs during this festive season. 🙂
Kat
November 17, 2023 at 12:38 pmAww thank you so much for posting this, and for reading! Wishing you the best too 🙂